second time today eh buddy? hehe. anyways, i had a pretty good day! i went to barnes and noble and studied there for a good 2 hours, then i went grocery shopping. i swear, going shopping at the market makes me feel like i'm so damn old. haha.. i donno. i feel like i aged 50 years when i went the pavillions today! it's so much more reassuring to go with "younger" friends. hehe. then i feel all retarded and young.. like "what the hell are we doing in a freaking grocery store?!" yeah.. i got a bit of bad news too.. i think i'm going to drop my soc 1 class now since i'm probably not going to go to santa cruz anymore.. (sniffle) i really am quite sad about it. *sigh* it was just such a beautiful and amazing school. i would have loved it there beyond belief. it was... my most gorgeous dream.. and now it's gone. swept up and gone like everything else.. :/ i feel so sad right now! i mean, i know that no matter where i end up going.. i will adjust, and i will learn to like it if not at first sight.. but, it's just that.. it was such an attainable and beautiful goal for me.. something that was within reach.. something i could work for. but, all b/c of $$. i can't have it. christ. it makes me LOATHE money. i know this would never work, but sometimes i think about how it would be if everyone got paid the same amount of money for different jobs.. or even if there WAS no monetary value in anything and we did things for each other b/c people WANT to help each other out... it's a shame that people are just too god damn selfish to allow that system work. it's not fair.. but i yes, i know, life's not fair. no need to lecture me and put me through a class on that matter. i know all too well. i guess i've been blessed with other things other than being rich. i know my family means well.. my mom is really great. even though her temper gets wayyy outta control at times.. she's a terrific mom.. one of the BEST! and we trust each other so much now.. i really value that. my sisters are sooo wonderful as well. i know sarah still has a bit of growing up to do.. but she's gonna be a great little bugger!! i can't say anything too great about my dad... except that he tries.. but... well, you can't have everything. i got my friends. GREAT friends.. the ones i do have. they're not perfect, but hey... who is? i've got my own set of faults as well... what can i say? except that i'm still quite CONTENT with what i have. most of the time, i'm abound with happiness. i guess, it's just that when i think about where i want to be... there are times when i wish things were different.. but those are just times. and times pass, like this one will. good night tobey. :)
<3,
karen
Moving - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
Rambles and Kansas! - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2008
In Manhattan, Kansas! - Sunday, Jan. 20, 2008
Minnesota! - Saturday, Jan. 12, 2008
First Interview!!! - Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
