okay.. this is NOT going to be a insane psycho crazy karen entry. >_< atleast, i hope not. i'm tired of being mad! i just want to get through this semester... it's just really hard and really stressful esp. when i'm working and stuff and trying to do these classes im doing. i just feel so overwhelmed sometimes...and not just with school either. it's not like i'm not trying. i'm trying so hard, but there just simply isn't enough time, money, good friends, .... i donno. i guess i just am surprised by many things.. things that become more and more evident to me as hours/days/weeks.. go by. yeah, we're all busy.. don't i know it. but geez, i thought friends were supposed to be there for each other? i thought your daddy was supposed to put you through school? i just thought... it isn't supposed to be like this. i guess i'm just mad because it seems like i never get what i put into any sort of relationship, whether it be with friends.. and sometimes even with family. even with SCHOOL. lately, it's been more friends than anything b/c i've been so stressed.. when im stressed, i turn to friends... i mean, doesnt everyone? i guess it makes me sad to think that everything has gotten this way. i'm surrounded by strangers all day... everyday. i study so much with classmates and by myself, and when im looking for just a little bit of familiarity and comfort, it's simply not there. it won't be there. i mean, not even a few minutes! after all these years, this is what it's become? these people think that they can buy me off with something expensive?? well, i dont want it. i dont want any bit or part of it. i just want friends that are there for me when i need them. is that asking too much? i mean, that question wasn't meant to be sarcastic. IS it asking too much? i really want to know. i mean, i dont think i ask for THAT much help.. i dont think that i'm a needy person.. but maybe i am and i dont know it? you know what i esp. hate tobey, even though the matter has passed... i hate _ _ _ _ s that have no meaning. no emotions or thoughts attached to them. how pointless.... i mean, you think you know a person.. then. nothing. hmm.. well, this entry wasnt a mad crazy entry at the least.. but it did make me sad.. not a single drop of satisfaction did it bring me. i'm very "all or nothing" aren't i? 99 tobey. i'll go drown my sorrows in.......... biology. >_<
a <3 less entry.. karen
Moving - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
Rambles and Kansas! - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2008
In Manhattan, Kansas! - Sunday, Jan. 20, 2008
Minnesota! - Saturday, Jan. 12, 2008
First Interview!!! - Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
