Hi love bug. How's it going on your side... I'm at Mike's right now. Him and his friends are playing poker. It was a boys thing so I went out with Rene earlier. We watched John Tucker Must Die and ate at BJ's afterwards. It was fun! I got back to Mike's around midnight.. and the boys were still playing poker. I kind of want to go home, but I'm too tired to drive for 30 minutes. So I think I'll just sleep here and go home in the morning.
Things are... I guess you could say better between KB and I. A lot has happened since I last wrote. Friday, Mike came over so that we could talk. We've been fighting a lot. I guess from his perspective, most of it is my fault. So we told each other how we felt about each other. Why we've been so irritated with each other and what we can do to compromise. We're trying... and that's important.
When I talked to Rene about it tonight, she said that I was being pessimistic about our relationship. And I know that she's right. I try to stay pessimistic so that I won't be disappointed later I think.. If I'm pessimistic, I won't have too many expectations from Mike.. or so I think.
I feel bad also because of these things that I want now that I never wanted before in a relationship. I didn't realize that I wanted a romantic guy to settle down with. I didn't know that being passionate about our relationship was so important to me until a few months ago. I feel bad to just drop the news on him suddenly on my feelings of love. I never meant for things to be this way... though I'm sure as in any relationship... people always have good intentions, these things just don't end up faring well... It's so incredibly frustrating to think on this so much. It really bothers me that our definitions of love are so different. It bothers me that our requirements of love are so different. We haven't worked out all the kinks but we are definitely trying. All I can hope is that it is enough. For the both of us.
Good night Tobey. See you.
<3 Karen
Moving - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
Rambles and Kansas! - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2008
In Manhattan, Kansas! - Sunday, Jan. 20, 2008
Minnesota! - Saturday, Jan. 12, 2008
First Interview!!! - Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
