sorry i haven't written in the greatest while, even though i had been given the opportunity to do so. well, just found out that the guy of my dreams, IS SO NOT, the guy of my dreams. don't you just hate it when that sort of thing happens? i wish i had never seen those things... it would have been nice to continue picturing this ideal person in my mind, even if we hardly speak! i suppose that doesn't make too much sense.. why do boys have to be... sooo... disgusting? i guess they can't help it, but i mean, some self control, please? that about sums it up. i'm through with looking for a nonexistant relationship! what can i say? except that BOYS STINK. =P
fasting from secular music was not that bad. in fact, i enjoyed it so much that i felt as if i were cheating the fast. fasting from media however, THAT was another story. in this one, i DID cheat... i used texted messaging.. AHHH!!! but not that much. yet i know too clearly, there is no excuse. it made me realize how weak i am in my relationship with God. i pray all the time that he would make me stronger.
oh yeah, we got a new PUPPY!!! his name is Cory, and he is absolutely darling. i'll post up pictures when i decide to be a member again. he's so stinking adorable though. wish you could see him. i have pix of him on friendster, myspace, and okcupid. except, none of my friends know im on okcupid because i chose my user name to be 'anonmouse' and they won't let me change it!! oh well. i like my username anyhow. =D i think it's quite funny! anyhow, better for me to meet people i DON'T know around here anyway. i met this really nice person, who is also christian, who helps me out with my weirdest questions.... =)
my spring break consisted of eating, relaxing, moping a little, working a bit, just hanging out a lot with ben, edmond and cory <3! saw mike and caroline too. =) and a lot of ppl at shauns ever famous party, which i DID NOT drink at! (aren't you so proud?) oh yes.. i have great dilemas about drinking and being Christian. some people say they are Christian and say that it's okay to drink. others say that they are CHristian and they think it's wrong to drink. who's right? my sister says its okay to drink, but not get drunk. ahhh i don't even know. but until i find out, i decided i won't.
i was watching x-men with my dad, sarah and cory, and it just made me think. i mean, the movie itself is OKAY, not really one of my favorite, favorites, but i think it has a really good POINT to it, and that's what i love about it! the point being, that humans fear what they don't understand, and creating fear only leads to disaterous effects. politician in the movie who is very much against mutants and wants them all to register so that everyone can know who they are... doesn't that sound a little familiar with what our government did with middle eastern people a few years ago after 9/11? people take the tiniest hint of fear and explode it into the scariest nightmare of all... when really it should have stayed exactly what it is. a hint of fear and nothing more. but you know what? i do it too. i take my biggest fear (the dark, monsters, ect.) and i myself, hand mold this tiny tiny piece of fear into a huge scary thing, when it doesnt have to be that way! i've noticed that when i don't dwell on the thoughts that scare me, they go away. it's when i THINK about it, and let my imagination run wild that sweat starts to break. it's silly isn't it? we humans are so silly to be afraid, and to create and mold fear! true, fear does create somewhat of an economy. i mean, we sell so many things based on our paranoia. but to me, that's practically stolen money. psychotic murderers, shark attacks, dog bites, rapists, earthquakes, anything and everything that you could possibly be afraid of.. i mean, think about it. how often do these things happen to you? almost NEVER. it's just because of what we see on the media that makes us so fearful. 'bowling for columbine' made a good point about that. anyhow! i must go fill my tummy with strawberries. trying desperately to eat healthy. not thinking about boys anymore. 99
<3 karen
"So easily I fall, so easily you reach your hand out. So quickly will I drown, in all the pools of all my reason. So easily will I fear, so easily will your peace surpass me. Quickly will I trust in anything I think is worthy.
How many times you make the waves calm down, so I won't be afraid now? I saw you breaking my, breaking my fall. What am I supposed to do?
How precious are your thoughts? The manyt hat you think about me. How faithful are your ways. I always feel your grace abounding. How quickly will I call, how quickly will you answer my cry. How carefully you will bring, everything I need in my life.
How many times you make the waves calm down, so I won't be afraid now? I saw you breaking my, breaking my fall. What am I supposed to do?
This narrow road I�m walking, this world tries to draw. Your word will help me fight it. With you I'll face it all.
I saw you breaking my, breaking my fall,
What am I supposed to do?" [jeremy camp - breaking my fall]
*when he says "what am i supposed to do?" i don't think he means the question as confusion, but rather, what else can i do except to serve you for the rest of my days...
Moving - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
Rambles and Kansas! - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2008
In Manhattan, Kansas! - Sunday, Jan. 20, 2008
Minnesota! - Saturday, Jan. 12, 2008
First Interview!!! - Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
