Before I write anything down, I would first and foremost like to state that this entry is going to seem hypocritical to me and everyone else on the face of this planet. It goes hand and hand with the idea that everyone IS a hypocrite, whether they like it or not. Quite simply put, no one body is perfect. We're all humans, and we're all liable to make mistakes. And you know what?that's OKAY! I'm not making it out to be a horrid thing.
With that being said.. Last night I had a really good conversation with my friend about people in general. We all have certain people that get on our nerves, people that tend to step over our comfort line.. People who push our precious gumdrop buttons! Whether it's a person who cut you off on the road, a waiter that was rude to you at the restaurant, or even a friend you've known for years that you hold terrible thoughts about, we pass judgments on people based on their actions, words, and what we feel. I for one, do this ALL THE TIME! >_< I have a list of people in my head right this very moment that I can think of that bother the living daylights out of my tormented mind.
Thinking about this now at the ripe age of an opinionated 21 year old, I feel that this is all a mistake. I've said before, that one of my goals was to make judgments on people not based on their appearance but based on their talk/actions correct? I go even further to say that judgments can't be made PERIOD. Of course, even though I say this, I will consistently make these mistakes b/c I am only so human, although I don't mean to use it as an excuse to do so.
It's such a simple concept to grasp. Everyone is different! Not one person the same, yet, no body wants to understand this. Today, I realize now more than ever, how much I don't want to be something I don't believe in. I must say that it's a difficult pathway however, and over some hills, I really feel the strain, and most certainly I make more than my fair share of mistakes. Just look at all my older entries when I get pissed off and come here to vent! O_o Sometimes, I look back and think.. Wow, was I really THAT pissed off? I guess what I'm trying to say is that, I wish people would just TRY to understand each other. We don't always know the whole story of another person's life, no matter how well we think we know them, or how much we don't know them.
It's true that life hasn't handed us the perfect platter. We all got something we didn't want in life; family problems, financial issues, the death of a loved one, and even maybe what seemed like the death of our hearts. Life is tough cookies, there's no doubt about that! We all have our junk, and most of us don't lay it out on the table for the world to see. Everyone reacts according to what they've experienced, and make judgments based on what they've felt and known. To say that we all go through the exact same experiences would be a crime, and because none of us have experienced the maximum duration of each others pains, we just can't fully understand why people are the way they are; publicly, privately, or personally. I'm not saying that people aren't understandable, I'm saying that every single experience that another person has gone through, that has accumulated to become the person they are today is often misunderstood. I think it's something important to realize and understand.. and I think if we DID realize that when we get so bitter, we would stop thinking about our own damn feelings for once and maybe take into consideration that this other person, whom you know or don't know, isn't exactly like you!
I'm not trying to perfect the world Tobey. It's simply undoable. And you know what? I'm glad life is full of surprises and excitement, whether it be terrible ugly experiences or experiences that are so wonderful you'll hold them forever in your heart. What a boring place this world would be if it were not for our misgivings. How terribly ignorant would I have been if I never learned things the gruesome and ugly way? Maybe I would have turned out to be like some kind of battery operated robot who always thought one way and never any other way. This is going to sound so terribly strange, but THANK YOU life for all the things I thought I would never outlive! Thank you to the ex-boyfriend who left me for my friend, thank you my father for quitting your job, thank you life for all the tears and hurt I went through, for me to finally open my eyes and be the person I am today. lol, I sort of sound crazy huh?! I'm not in love with my pain, really I'm not. I don't embrace the crappiness of life. I just accept it and move onward, ready to live hand in hand with life and what its got for me.
"The future is as bleak or as beautiful as you want it to be."
<3 Karen
Moving - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
Rambles and Kansas! - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2008
In Manhattan, Kansas! - Sunday, Jan. 20, 2008
Minnesota! - Saturday, Jan. 12, 2008
First Interview!!! - Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
