I'm a strong believer in second chances. We're all humans. So I believe we are susceptible to error. If there was someone out there that claimed they've never made a mistake in their life, everyone would know that person would be a liar. I think people have the potential to learn from their mistakes. Sometimes, with minor discrepencies, it takes more than just once. You know. Things like.. starting to study for a test too late or other things really trivial. Things of little significance. Things that don't really alter your morals and beliefs. In the matter of something of real significance... There is the quote,
"If you forgive someone once, it's their fault. If you forgive someone thrice, it's your fault."
The quote comes it all different costumes. That's beside the point. It simply means, a second chance is what people get so to learn from their first mistake. So if someone did a wrong to me and I forgave them for it.. then it's okay to do so even though it was their fault, because hopefully, they would learn from their mistake. If the same person keeps repeating the mistake and you continue to forgive them for it, then the quote basically says that it's the forgiver's fault for forgiving them so many damn times and letting them get away with it.
So.. in my situation.. I've come to the decision of a third chance for someone. So the question is, to forgive once more and give a third chance? Or to walk away from what I consider serious wrongdoing? From what you can imagine.. I'm hurt from the lies. I'm hurt because I gave them a second chance and at that point when I gave them a second chance, they seemed to make it clear that they were sorry and realized it had been a mistake. So I said OKAY. Everyone deserves a second chance, and that chance was given and all was forgotten and I restored my trust to 100%. I think if you forgive someone for something, you should TRULY forgive them. This means, not badgering them about the problem over and over again about it. I said it was forgiven. So it's done at that point.
So imagine my shock at my new discovery. Not very pleasant. Just met with disappointment, shock.. a little bit of disgustment, anger and sadness all mixed into one big ball of an emotion that I can't seem to swallow down. I feel very depressed about it.
A third chance was asked for, and I felt like I was in a dilemma. Of course I want to give them another chance.. Of course I want everything to work out.. the only thing is.. I don't know how to build the trust that was formed back up to par. I usually forgive and forget.. but I can't do that with repeat mistakes.. I said I believe in second chances. Not third, fourth, fifth, or infinity chances. But. I did tell them that I would try to give them a third chance.
It's hard to try and convince my heart that it's all right to do this. Because I really believed them that it wouldn't happen again. I really, really believed it.
I guess.. I'm just feeling a little sad about the whole situation. I wish a lot of things.. I feel confused. I feel.. so shocked still.. I feel so many things at once and I really should be studying for a test tomorrow. I'll try to sort out my thoughts later.. Wish me luck Tobes. 99.
<3 Karen
Moving - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
Rambles and Kansas! - Thursday, Feb. 07, 2008
In Manhattan, Kansas! - Sunday, Jan. 20, 2008
Minnesota! - Saturday, Jan. 12, 2008
First Interview!!! - Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
